Soft steps
In the alpine...and in life.
My wife and I share the same passion for the mountains. We spend countless days, hours, minutes and seconds navigating the Canadian Rockies on foot..peak bagging, scrambling, soloing and exploring. My most treasured memories have been built during our long days in big terrain together.
Sharing such a consequential and intricate expression of effort together has not only formed a special bond between us, but has helped me stay hyperaware of the partner I wish to be for her and the man I desire to be for myself.
As in life, our roles in the mountains are fluid and ever evolving. Some days I lead, others I follow. Sometimes we move quickly, with intention, others slowly with delicacy. Some days are easy, some are not. Plans go as intended, other times they do not. In both life and our days in the alpine, we have a shared goal…to move forward, together, in the best style possible.
On ascents, I tend to take point. The terrain is often steep, dangerous and temporary. Careless steps and lazy decisions can send life ending rockfall toward her in the blink of an eye. My internal dialogue often simply repeats “step softly”, sometimes thousands of times per outing. My vision locks in not just on the next few feet ahead, but on every rock, every hand hold, every tiny bit of dirt, every little detail. My minds internal blinders create a hyper focus on the angle of the climb, the solidity of the rock, it makes dozens of calculations each and every upward movement, looking for any and every small sign of potential danger and instability.
And with every step, every solved equation of how to move safely together, I step softly, with more intention than any other moment in my day. This process repeats itself every few seconds, for hours on end, as we venture on.
And it reminds me every time, that this is how we love each other in all areas of life. And how you must love, if you truly love. This is how you to find a deep connection to your lived experience.
Living with intention, on a microscopic level.
Our roles in life are fluid and ever evolving, as they are in the mountains. Life is seldom simple and straightforward and often the end product is a result of a million micro adjustments, as it is in the mountains. For me, it is simply not enough to wake up and try hard every day for her and for us…that is carelessly vague and lazy. Rather, my bandwidth is spent recognizing the value of every small action and decision I make and how they form a whole that is my love and partnership to her, as well as my own experience as I navigate life.
The balance of our lives is more fragile than we admit. We are almost always a small number of decisions and actions away from catastrophic failures or stratospheric successes, and typically those actions and decisions aren’t obviously significant.
The way you live your life matters…to yourself and to those around you. Intention matters in all your moments large and small. It matters how much you sleep, it matters what you eat, it matters who you hold close, it matters how you spend your time. It also matters how you listen, how you connect with people and the earth beneath your feet, how you learn and evolve and reflect on your lived experiences. It all matters, just as every step up a mountain matters.
A few careless moves, a few lazy moments, and the ground beneath your feet can crumble. Conversely, a few well thought out moves, a life parter you work in step with and a deep connection to your environment, can propel you forward, upwards and onwards, rapidly. These words are true for both the mountains and life.
I write this primarily because I am thankful to have experiences with my life partner that keep me so present and connected to her and to my life, but also because I see so many people so disconnected from a life well lived. The distance between an existence full of depth and connection and one of superficiality and mediocrity is not that large and those who are truly thriving, are almost always, simply, living with intention.
Thank you again, to my wife, the love of my life and the eyes that have helped me see how this life is to be lived. I love you endlessly.
Onward, Always.